I was at the mall yesterday, something I don’t do too often because: a) I don’t have any money b)I don’t like the crowds c)I don’t have a heck of a lot of free time or d)all of the above.
D. The answer is D. But that’s not the point of the story. You know, I’ve been through a fair share of fads in my time. I grew up in the 80’s, so I’ve seen some of the best of them. Hell, I’ve been a part of more than one of them…rolled jeans comes to mind. So as I was walking the mall, I thought maybe I would overlook the fact that some kid was wearing huge, white sunglasses….in the mall. But then I saw two more people, apparently they were all together, wearing almost the exact same glasses. Then another wearing aviator glasses, and another and another. They were everywhere. Why the hell would you wear sunglasses inside? There’s an old saying (from the book of Jay Brown): You’re always cool when you’re wearing sunglasses. I don’t think this is exactly true, for two reasons. The words were spoken by a drunk homeless guy in Boston at 2am, and every one of those idiots at the mall looked like a dope. These people are in second place for being not cool. First place goes to this guy.
Oh, and and to the larger ladies…please don’t wear a mini-skirt. They’re gross enough on attractive women.